The Bribe is Never Enough

I HAVE AT PERIODIC moments in my careers been offered bribes — monetary inducements to do something my employer (or I) would find questionable at best. My response has always been, “No.”

The counter has been, predictably, “What’s your price? Everybody has a price.”

To which my reply has always been (and always will be), “You can’t afford it.”

“Oh, come on!” my interlocutor will attempt to jolly me into naming a price. Maybe, he thinks, he can afford it. But he’s wrong.

“You can’t afford it because you’d have to replace my job. Figure I have twenty years’ working life left, you’d have to come up with over a million dollars, to support me and my wife in any style at all. Figuring I’d have to defend myself against prosecution, the price would probably go up to five or ten million. How much did you say this little favor you’re asking is worth to you?”

They always walk away. See, it’s not a matter of a high moral standards (although I have them, too, I’m just trying to talk in HIS language — figuring that’s easier to explain to someone who’d try to subvert the proper order of things). It’s a matter of practicality. That’s why I’d never fall for a government bribe.

Monday, in the 1:00 hour, Rush reported on a CNN story about how myriad thousands of temporary workers are now out of work, because their jobs stopped when the (so-called) “stimulus” funds (read: government bribe) ran out.

What did they expect? That Uncle Sam was going to support them forever? Yeah, right!

While it’s morally wrong to accept stolen goods — and that’s what you’re doing when you accept government transfer payments, no matter what the rationale — it’s also stupid, because sooner or later the money runs out, and you’re stuck back where you were. Only now, the government has raped the economy of all those billions of dollars for your little bribe, and there’s even less of a chance for you to get a real job.

Suckers.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *