SO IT’S THAT TIME of year again. Plug in the old axe, crank it up to eleven, and …GIT-tar…
Na-na-na-na-nana-da-nang! (chka-chka-chka-boomp!) Na-na-na-na-nana-da-nang! (chka-chka-chka-boomp!) (key change) Na-na-na-na-nana-da-nang! (chk-chk-chk) Na-na-na-na-nana-da-nang!
You say it’s your birthday! Na-na-na-na-nana-da-nang! Well it’s my birthday, too, yeah! Na-na-na-na-nana-da-nang! I’m glad it’s your birthday! Na-na-na-na-nana-da-nang! Happy birthday TO you!
Alger turns fifty-nine today. Say nice things to him. Maybe he’ll give me a raise.
Why Dolly! How sweet. Tell you what. If we get ten comments — from ten, different, REAL people — I’ll give you a fifty percent raise!
Gee, thanks, boss!
Hey! Waitjustagoddamnminute! You don’t pay me anything now!
A-a-a-nd… your point is…?
Fifty percent of nothin’ is still nothin’
Yebbut: a raise is a raise. And anything is better than nothin’, innit?
Do I **LOOK** blonde?
Well, now that you mention it, your hair is kind of light red this last time. Did they do something different? Maybe a strawberry blonde, as we used to call it back in the ’60s?
You know, the cats are not the only ones who know how to kill you in your sleep.
Ah-ah-aahh! “Nice things.” Remember?
Grrrr! ::slow burn::
Update: So we made it to ten comments, even if two of them were from me, so — fair’s fair — I’m giving Dolly the raise. Fifty percent of her base salary.
Gee, thanks, Boss. Ya shoonta.
You’re welcome. And to show how much, here’s a bonus.
Really? Real money, all for me?
Fifty cents!? Your generosity is overwhelming!
Well, it’s more like thirty cents after taxes, but: you’re welcome. It’s your share of the money — note I don’t say “profits” — we’ve made off the blog this year.
Really? But, we don’t…
No! Really. I know we can’t afford this. Here! Take it back!
Can’t. I’ve already done the paperwork and paid the withholding and FICA to the government. Make sure you report it. I’ll get you a 1099 next January.
Did I say this already? Grrrrr!